November 2010
4 posts
1 tag
Lessons learned from conversing with girls (Vol....
Or things I have said that have caused fights. A series of posts that reflect poorly on me.
This is not a story about the time I asked a girl to grab coffee on the same day she was — unbeknownst to me — attending her grandfather’s wake. This is not the tale of how I learned that the following is not what one should say in such an instance: “What’s the rush?...
1 tag
Heart transplant, turn right
The 16 year-old lovesick emo version of me would have a field day with the above sign. It would inspire a bad poem, and I would try to turn that into what would have been a crappy punk rock song (ANY! ANY! ANY! ANY! ANY! OTHER HEART WILL DO!”).
I would have been so enamored with this “heart transplant” sign that I probably would have even given it an accompanying short story....
1 tag
Dear Neighbor, I am sorry I had your girlfriend's...
Dear Neighbor, I am sorry I am responsible for having your girlfriend’s car towed. You see that note at the top of this post? The one that’s also in our garage? That was me. Those aren’t my words, of course. I can’t take credit for the prose of our landlord, but I totally inspired that. It’s also on my fridge. I had to keep it. That’s not weird, is it? I’m not Lou Reed. I’m not...
1 tag
